This holiday is actually all about relationships. Thanksgiving was started when the pilgrims came to Massachusetts. The first year was very difficult with lack of food, lots of sickness, and death. The relationships that they formed with the Wampanoag Indians helped them the next year. Yet they were a people who had already formed a relationship with someone. Many of the settlers came because there was a chance for land, money, or freedom; however, some of the settlers came because they wanted to worship God in freedom. They prized this relationship so much that they were willing to leave their comfortable lives and find a place where they could worship without persecution. I live in a country founded on Christian principles, have a wonderful family that raised me with Christian morals. I am truly blessed.

Hebrews 12:28

²⁸ Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe,

Father, You have blessed me by putting me in a nation where I have freedom to worship You. I can thank You for all the many gifts that You give. My family, my mother's health, being with my dad during his skin cancer treatment, my new nephew, my new home, good friends, my job, my boss, the skills that you have given me. These are all great gifts from You. Father, I wish to take this thanksgiving and share it with the world. As opportunities arise, may I be open to You will. As I look for opportunities to share the gospel, may You be with me. As I hope, dream, and pray to minister on the mission field, would You show me how to minister were ever I am. As I seek to worship and honor You, would You be so present in my life that I cannot do anything apart from You and that would hurt You. Give me strength, give me love, give me good deeds to do so that I may share You to the world. Amen.

Jeremiah 29:11 (English Standard Version)

¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

This is one of the most well known verses in the bible. Most people use this verse to say, "See God will bless my life. He wants good things for me." This is true, but not a lot of people can tell you what's around the verse.

Jeremiah 29 (English Standard Version)

Jeremiah’s Letter to the Exiles

¹These are the words of the letter that Jeremiah the prophet sent from Jerusalem to the surviving elders of the exiles, and to the priests, the prophets, and all the people, whom Nebuchadnezzar had taken into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon. ²This was after King Jeconiah and the queen mother, the eunuchs, the officials of Judah and Jerusalem, the craftsmen, and the metal workers had departed from Jerusalem. ³The letter was sent by the hand of Elasah the son of Shaphan and Gemariah the son of Hilkiah, whom Zedekiah king of Judah sent to Babylon to Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon. It said: ⁴"Thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel, to all the exiles whom I have sent into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: ⁵ Build houses and live in them; plant gardens and eat their produce. ⁶Take wives and have sons and daughters; take wives for your sons, and give your daughters in marriage, that they may bear sons and daughters; multiply there, and do not decrease. ⁷But seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the LORD on its behalf, for in its welfare you will find your welfare. ⁸For thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel: Do not let your prophets and your diviners who are among you deceive you, and do not listen to the dreams that they dream, ⁹for it is a lie that they are prophesying to you in my name; I did not send them, declares the LORD.

¹⁰"For thus says the LORD: When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will visit you, and I will fulfill to you my promise and bring you back to this place. ¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. ¹² Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. ¹³ You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart. ¹⁴I will be found by you, declares the LORD, and I will restore your fortunes and gather you from all the nations and all the places where I have driven you, declares the LORD, and I will bring you back to the place from which I sent you into exile.

So I would concur. This verse is talking about how God does want to give us good things. He first's instructs them how to live while they are in exile. He says to multiply and prosper. He tells them don't trust other prophets because they are not from Him. Lastly He tells them that He will fulfill His promise and bring them back to Israel. However this is where I think He starts talking about the true plans full of hope. He says,"you will call upon me and come and pray to me...you will seek me...you seek me with all your heart." I think this is the plan that will truly prosper us. I think God is plan that will give us hope. God gives a relationship with Himself to us as the plan that will bring us good things.

The Israelites probably thought the plan that was going to bless them so much was being returned to the land of Israel, yet this is a temporary thing. The good things that I expect God to bless me with are sometimes temporary as well. But what if I realize as I live out my day that my relationship with God is what will bring me hope and a future.

John 17
Jesus Prays to Be Glorified
1 After Jesus said this, he looked toward heaven and prayed:
“Father, the hour has come. Glorify your Son, that your Son may glorify you. 2 For you granted him authority over all people that he might give eternal life to all those you have given him. 3 Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. 4 I have brought you glory on earth by finishing the work you gave me to do. 5 And now, Father, glorify me in your presence with the glory I had with you before the world began.

Jesus Prays for His Disciples
6 “I have revealed you to those whom you gave me out of the world. They were yours; you gave them to me and they have obeyed your word. 7 Now they know that everything you have given me comes from you. 8 For I gave them the words you gave me and they accepted them. They knew with certainty that I came from you, and they believed that you sent me. 9 I pray for them. I am not praying for the world, but for those you have given me, for they are yours. 10 All I have is yours, and all you have is mine. And glory has come to me through them. 11 I will remain in the world no longer, but they are still in the world, and I am coming to you. Holy Father, protect them by the power of your name, the name you gave me, so that they may be one as we are one. 12 While I was with them, I protected them and kept them safe by that name you gave me. None has been lost except the one doomed to destruction so that Scripture would be fulfilled.
13 “I am coming to you now, but I say these things while I am still in the world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them. 14 I have given them your word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world. 15 My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. 16 They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. 17 Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth. 18 As you sent me into the world, I have sent them into the world. 19 For them I sanctify myself, that they too may be truly sanctified.

Jesus Prays for All Believers
20 “My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, 21 that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. 22 I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one— 23 I in them and you in me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.
24 “Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world.

25 “Righteous Father, though the world does not know you, I know you, and they know that you have sent me. 26 I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them.”

One of the things that God has been bringing to my attention is knowledge of Him is very important. "Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent." I am praying that God brings knowledge of Him into my life.

Another thing that I have been struggling with is unity with my fellow Christian and unity with God. "Holy Father, protect them by the power of your name, the name you gave me, so that they may be one as we are one." This must have been important to Christ for Him to pray for it in one of His last prayers. My unity with my fellow Christians must be some thing I strive for.

"My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one." All to often I find myself shutting out the world. It is so much easier than trying to live as a Christian among them. At other times I find my self going with the flow of the world and not living a sanctified life. I am struggling between two fine lines. A holy, set apart life or a life that buys into the worlds games.

God knows us so well that He realizes that we believe that we could not possible have the same love from Him that He has for His son. "I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them." The more knowledge of God that we have, will that make us more aware of the love that He has for us. The same love He has for His own son.

Jesus, You prayed for these things. That I would have knowledge of God, that I would have unity with my fellow Christian, that I would be protected from the evil one. You prayed for the same love that the Father gives You, that He would give it to me. I desire to have a heart ofter Yours. That my longings would be the same as Yours. Make me aware and change my heart to believe that I have the same love from the Father. May I be so aware of all these things that my life would look and feel different. Jesus You said that You would be in me. Be in me today and every day. Give me Your Spirit. Give me Your heart for the world. Give me unity with the Father. Amen.

John 3:16 (English Standard Version)

For God So Loved the World

¹⁶"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.



I have been listening to a sermon by Josiah Bancroft. He talks about how we as Christians often try and use our own good works to supplement, take the place of, or even ignore God's grace. We would rather not have to test the "belief" that God sent His son in our place. We would rather rely on our own good works to present before the Father to try and distract from our own sin.

We are called to intentionally rely on God. Are we putting our trust in Christ and His righteousness? Do we have fruit that shows we are leaning solely on God is not only carry out the law on our behalf, but to also work in our hearts to make us more like Him? Are we seeking a relationship and not a business transaction with God? "You take care on my sin and I'll try and sin less." It doesn't work.

Father, please show me how to rely on You. Please give me understanding and knowledge of who your are, so that I may become more like You. Change my heart, change who I am. May Your love for me become evident in my life. May Your love for the world, that is a great as You giving Your son for the world, be in my heart and actions. Bless my friend who is struggling with being unable to have children right now. Heal her heart and her spirit. Bless her with many children. Amen

Psalm 46 (English Standard Version)

Psalm 46

God Is Our Fortress

To the choirmaster. Of the Sons of Korah. According to Alamoth. A Song.

¹God is our refuge and strength,
a very present help in trouble.
²Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way,
though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea,
³though its waters roar and foam,
though the mountains tremble at its swelling.
Selah

⁴There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,
the holy habitation of the Most High.
⁵ God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved;
God will help her when morning dawns.
⁶ The nations rage, the kingdoms totter;
he utters his voice, the earth melts.
⁷ The LORD of hosts is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.
Selah

⁸ Come, behold the works of the LORD,
how he has brought desolations on the earth.
⁹ He makes wars cease to the end of the earth;
he breaks the bow and shatters the spear;
he burns the chariots with fire.
¹⁰ "Be still, and know that I am God.
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth!"
¹¹ The LORD of hosts is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.
Selah

We are a waring nation made of sheep. We were made to glorify our Father in heaven and enjoy Him. Yet we have strife in our hearts. Yet we war against ourselves, against nature, against each other. Often the source of this strife is my rights, my life, my wanting to be god.

There are many passages that speak of the knowledge of God fixing man made problems. Just knowing God can change a nation, change a life, a heart, a soul. His grace is so sufficient that He not only takes our strife, but He fills us with His peace. He not only can take our anger and self-righteousness and empty the cup completely of our waring spirit, He sends His Holy Spirit to fill us overflowing with all the good things that He desires us to portray. We have a big God. It takes all the resources of the universe to save us. Come take your rest in the Knowledge of God. Be still in Him.

Father, please give me knowledge of You. May I be still in You. May the nations rejoice in You because I have your knowledge and rest in You. Take away my strifeful spirit. Replace my spirit with Your Holy Spirit. Amen.

As a nurse I often work with people who have chronic problems. Asthma is a disease that a person will have to manage their breathing for life. Diabetes Type I is where the body is unable to produce the right amount of insulin for the body. Crones, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, hypertension, HIV/AIDS, Gout are all diseases that we have to manage and are unable to cure. Patients are often frustrated when they come to the hospital and we are unable to cure them. These patients will need to manage their disease for the rest of their life.

Sin a disease that is a disease that is worked into our DNA, just like Diabetes Type I. Sin is a disease I often find my self trying to manage, but like my patients often find themselves over whelmed with their disease and it gets out of hand. I then try and check myself into a spiritual hospital. Yet there is a cure. It requires a total transplant. Christ's life for mine. No part of mine may be left behind.

Holy Spirit, please come and take over my life. There are ways and places in my life that I don't even realize that I need you to work in my life. Father you have the power to do that and more. I ask in Your Sons Name, Jesus Christ, that you would work in my life. Amen.

Once again I am blogging on another passage from Top Passages From Our Top Ten Cities.
Romans 8 (English Standard Version)

Life in the Spirit
1There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. 2For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. 3For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, 4in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. 5For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. 6For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace. 7For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God’s law; indeed, it cannot. 8Those who are in the flesh cannot please God.

9You, however, are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if in fact the Spirit of God dwells in you. Anyone who does not have the Spirit of Christ does not belong to him. 10But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. 11If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you.
Heirs with Christ
12So then, brothers, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh. 13For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. 14For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. 15For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, "Abba! Father!" 16 The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 17and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.
Future Glory
18For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. 19For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. 20For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope 21that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. 22For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. 23And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. 24For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? 25But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.

26Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. 27And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. 28And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. 29For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. 30And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified.
God’s Everlasting Love
31What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? 33Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. 34 Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised— who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. 35Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? 36As it is written,

"For your sake we are being killed all the day long;
we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered."

37No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

This passage reminds me of everything I have been learning in Sonship. This passage talks about the difference between the flesh and the spirit, the law and God's righteousness. The waring of our sinful nature with the Holy Spirit is very evident in my life. I think Paul said," I do the things I do not want to do, but the things I want to do I don't." My spirit longs to follow God's commands, to do the work He has given me with a joyful heart; yet my flesh cries out that I seek after what I desire. I recently heard a story about the Holy Spirit:

A woman who was a recent convert to Christianity came to the Pastor and said,"I think that we need to start a place that the prostitutes in this town can come. We can teach them skills so that they can get work and give them a place of refuge. The pastor said,"Sounds great why don't you start that." So she did. A little while later the house for the prostitutes was set up and running well. The woman came to the pastor again and said,"I think we need to start a children after school program. The children are running around and getting into trouble. They need a safe place they can play and learn." The pastor said,"Great, why don't you start that." So she did. A little later she came to the pastor and said,"I think we need to start a soup kitchen for the poor in our community. We have people who are going hungry." The pastor once again said,"Sounds great, Why don't you start that." She did. A missionary asked her,"How did you start all these ministries as such a new Christian?" She asked him,"Haven't you ever heard of the Holy Spirit?"

It's a funny story. Kind of reminds me of the little red hen. Yet this story should be about my own life. I should be working through the Holy Spirit. Allowing my Holy Father to work through me. I am a daughter and heir to the King. Why can't I?

Dear Holy Spirit, come and work through me. Work through me as I work in my job. May my patients see you and not me. Work through me as I do karate. May discipline, strength, and humility that comes from you be evident in my life. May the same love that cannot separate me from the love of God be shown to others in my life. Give me a love that the world has never known that I might show it to them.

Paths of Righteousness

I am returning to the article The Top Five Passages from Our Top Ten Cities, but I felt I needed share my experiences from the Global Missions Conference. Most of the cities had 1 Corinthians, Psalm 23, Romans 8, John 3:16; yet Singapore had a very different set of passages. This passage comes from one on Singapore's list.


Proverbs 2
The Value of Wisdom
1 My son, if you receive my words
and treasure up my commandments with you,
2making your ear attentive to wisdom
and inclining your heart to understanding;
3yes, if you call out for insight
and raise your voice for understanding,
4if you seek it like silver
and search for it as for hidden treasures,
5then you will understand the fear of the LORD
and find the knowledge of God.
6For the LORD gives wisdom;
from his mouth come knowledge and understanding;
7he stores up sound wisdom for the upright;
he is a shield to those who walk in integrity,
8guarding the paths of justice
and watching over the way of his saints.
9 Then you will understand righteousness and justice
and equity, every good path;
10for wisdom will come into your heart,
and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul;
11 discretion will watch over you,
understanding will guard you,
12delivering you from the way of evil,
from men of perverted speech,
13who forsake the paths of uprightness
to walk in the ways of darkness,
14who rejoice in doing evil
and delight in the perverseness of evil,
15men whose paths are crooked,
and who are devious in their ways.

16So you will be delivered from the forbidden woman,
from the adulteress with her smooth words,
17who forsakes the companion of her youth
and forgets the covenant of her God;
18 for her house sinks down to death,
and her paths to the departed;
19none who go to her come back,
nor do they regain the paths of life.

20So you will walk in the way of the good
and keep to the paths of the righteous.
21For the upright will inhabit the land,
and those with integrity will remain in it,
22but the wicked will be cut off from the land,
and the treacherous will be rooted out of it.

This passage is father addressing his son. He is encouraging his son to follow what he has said so that, "you will understand the fear of the LORD
and find the knowledge of God."
The father then goes onto talk about how the wisdom of God is a good thing, pleasant to your soul. How many times have I wished to be watched over by discretion and guarded by understanding? Too many to count has my mouth run away with the unkind or indecent words that I was thinking.
Not only will this protect you from yourself, this wisdom and knowledge of God will protect you from people. These men who are perverse, enjoy doing evil. I sometimes find it difficult to ask people in the work place to stop being perverse. I hate to say that sometimes I join in that kind of talk. I pray the knowledge of God will protect me from joining in anymore; because the next part of the passage talks about a forbidden, adulterous woman. That is not the kind of woman I want to be. She forgets her covenant with God. I wish to share my covenant with God to the world, to my children, and my grandchildren.
My dad recently preached a sermon. One of the things that he said over and over through out the sermon was we must,"intentionally rely on God." This passage in Proverbs refers to path righteousness, paths of life, and paths of darkness. If you go for a walk you have to pay attention to where you are going. You have to look where you are going. If you are just looking at the pretty sky or looking at the pretty tree tops, you are going to stray off the path. What might be unintentional might stray into the intentional of sin. I know that I must intentionally rely on God for my strength by reading His word, praying, joining into fellowship with Him.

In his name the nations will put their hope.

The verse that was the theme for the week was Matthew 12:21 "In his name the nations will put their hope."

I forgot to mentions that Saturday night we had the pleasure of listen to a song by Shia Linne. His lyrics were amazing and he was so kind to put up the lyrics on a screen so that the "ebonically" challenged could follow him.



I had a chance to visit the Honduras booth and meet Erin Pettengill. She talked about her work in Honduras, the kind of training she got, and some of the stories she has of living in Honduras. I loved meeting her. Someday it would be neat to go visit her in Honduras God willing.

Also on Saturday night I went to the gym. I meet a girl who was also going to the conference and we started talking about our experiences. As we shared parts of our testimony, I just felt my heart filled once again with how awesome is our God. It is so encouraging to share similar experiences with people and see how God is carried you both through.

I think now I can start on Sunday. We had a wonderful breakfast. I meet a woman named Rita who was a former nurse. She talked about how she and her husband, a doctor, had served in different places. She told me how in Haiti she had delivered a baby all by herself and how she had feed AIDS babies in africa because all the nurses had given up on the babies as they were going to die anyway.

Before this weekend I have always shied away from AIDS. It's a scary disease and one that is often mishandled. But this is also one where many of the things that I enjoy about nursing have opportunity to be done. I love teaching people how to manage illnesses. I love teaching about preventing complications. I love helping people get control of their illnesses so they can help others. God is softening my heart towards these people.

Then I went to seminar on Thriving In Ministry Beyond Your Comfort Zone. Two women, both missionaries in South Africa shared part of their testimonies. One of the women felt she wasn't very good with children, but she ended up teaching in them in a school. The other woman spoke of how she started teaching bible at a school in a shanty town. "I heard the words come out of my mouth and listened to myself say, 'Can I teach bible at your school?" Having had some of those experiences where God speaks and I hear Him coming out of my mouth, but I can't stop it I felt akin to this woman.

I then went to a seminar on Engaging the Dragon: Church Planting Contextualized in East Asia. The testimonies of how God is working in a very closed part of the world was powerful. One of the sugestions that spoke to me was to invite international students into your home. Have them over for coffee, your child's play, or family event. They often do not see any of the United States except their apartment where they live and their college campus. In the seminar they said that 1/4 of students who come to the US become Christians white they are here. What power is that and how can we ignore it?

Rev. Joe Novenson closed the convention a reminder that as Christians we have a a stunning identity, we have a stunning cause, and we have a stunning behavior. He used Proverbs 11:30 and he used this story:

An elderly man was returning home from work one day. He was a little over weight and didn't walk very fast. He like to sometimes take a shortcut through a park. It was getting late and the sun was starting to go down. As he is walking through the park he hear's something. He stops and listens. It sounds muffled and like someone is scared and it is coming from some bushes. In a few seconds a few thought enter his mind,'Should I ignore it? Should I go get help? Will it be too late if I go get someone? What can I do? I'm not fit enough to be of any use?' But he hears the muffled, frightened sound again, so through the bushes he plunges. He sees a man raping a woman. The old man jumps on the back of the rapist, yelling in his ear. The rapist so stunned flees the scene. The woman not being able to tell old attacker from a new one starts screaming and backing up into the trees. The old man trying to comfort her says,"It's alright. I'm not going to hurt you. Are you alright?" The woman then says,"Daddy?" The old man had saved his own daughter.

We are in a world where sin is thrust into our lives and harms us on every side. As we minister to the world we may have the opportunity to hear someone say as we point them to our Heavenly Father,"Daddy?"

Proverbs 11:30 (Today's New International Version)

30 The fruit of the righteous is a tree of life,
and those who win souls are wise.

PCA Global Missions Conference

I had so much fun at the PCA Global Mission Conference. I reconnected with old friends. I made some new one. I found spiritual rest as we feed each other with our testimonies and the gospel.

We started Friday night and Michael Oh started by sharing some of his testimony and work in Japan. His powerful testimony was the perfect way to start the conference.

Then Dr. Paul Kooistra preached from Ephesians 1:3-14. One of the things that he said spoke to me,"It takes all of the resources of the universe to change us and make us holy...The best is yet to come...because the Holy Spirit has sealed a future for us."

After this I had an opportunity to visit the different exhibits from missionaries around the world. I meet up with Steve McGee who I had meet in Trinidad.

Saturday we heard from Rev. Joe Novenson about: Do You Feel the Gap Between Your Condition and Your Calling? The answer is yes I do. He encouraged us to know God better and then we will be more defined by our calling than our condition.

I then went to a seminar on What You Would Love to Know About Your Missionary Women. There I re-meet Betsy Christiansen. She was the first nurse to help me start an IV.

I then went to a seminar on Medical Mission: The Vision, The Reality. Ted Kuhns compared mercy ministries to a bridesmaid. The church is the bride and Christ is the groom. The role of the bridesmaid is to assist the bride. The primary goal of mission work is to preach the gospel. Some times this is not being done. How this is done properly is to work along side a church and use the medical ministry as an aid to the gospel. The medical ministry may leave after a few weeks, but the relationships and the discipleship the a clinic provided for that church goes on. It is important that there is a church to carry on with those relationships.

Much of this idea was echoed in a later seminar by Keith Bucklen in Making Medicine Serve the Gospel. So much money, so many people are sent on medical missions each year; however, these trips need to be well thought out and planned so that we strategically share the gospel. Problems that can arise are: Medical Missions can take away the business of local doctors, natives may feel like they have to go through a conversion experience to receive/in exchange for medical care, or we preach the gospel and then we leave with no infrastructure to carry on the work started.

Both these men gave me much to think and pray about.

I then bumped into Drew Wilkins and later meet his wife Lindsey. He had been my soccer coach in high school. He told me about the work he was doing with Third Culture Kids(TCK). Before this conversation I did not know what a was. It is a child who has grown up outside of their parents native country. As an army brat, I found that I was so encouraged by their ministry. It was the feelings of not belonging and loneliness that came from moving around and never really belonging that lead me to rely on Christ. I am so excited for their ministry and can't wait to see what God does through them!

That night we were able to hear again Dr. Paul Kooistra on Theology Through Prayer. It was a very convicting sermon on the power of prayer, encouraging people to pray saying,"Prayer is hard work that takes the most time...If you are not praying for missions, then maybe you should reconsider missions."

So that was Friday and Saturday. I will update later on Sunday.

2010 GMC Live - Friday from Seth Wallace on Vimeo.

2010 - GMC Recap - Saturday from Seth Wallace on Vimeo.

Genesis 1

The Beginning

¹ In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. ² Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.

³ And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. ⁴ God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness. ⁵ God called the light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day.

⁶ And God said, “Let there be a vault between the waters to separate water from water.” ⁷ So God made the vault and separated the water under the vault from the water above it. And it was so. ⁸ God called the vault “sky.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the second day.

⁹ And God said, “Let the water under the sky be gathered to one place, and let dry ground appear.” And it was so. ¹⁰ God called the dry ground “land,” and the gathered waters he called “seas.” And God saw that it was good.
¹¹ Then God said, “Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds.” And it was so. ¹²The land produced vegetation: plants bearing seed according to their kinds and trees bearing fruit with seed in it according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. ¹³And there was evening, and there was morning—the third day.

¹⁴ And God said, “Let there be lights in the vault of the sky to separate the day from the night, and let them serve as signs to mark sacred times, and days and years, ¹⁵ and let them be lights in the vault of the sky to give light on the earth.” And it was so. ¹⁶ God made two great lights—the greater light to govern the day and the lesser light to govern the night. He also made the stars. ¹⁷ God set them in the vault of the sky to give light on the earth, ¹⁸ to govern the day and the night, and to separate light from darkness. And God saw that it was good. ¹⁹ And there was evening, and there was morning—the fourth day.

²⁰ And God said, “Let the water teem with living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the vault of the sky.” ²¹ So God created the great creatures of the sea and every living thing with which the water teems and that moves about in it, according to their kinds, and every winged bird according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. ²²God blessed them and said, “Be fruitful and increase in number and fill the water in the seas, and let the birds increase on the earth.” ²³ And there was evening, and there was morning—the fifth day.

²⁴ And God said, “Let the land produce living creatures according to their kinds: the livestock, the creatures that move along the ground, and the wild animals, each according to its kind.” And it was so. ²⁵ God made the wild animals according to their kinds, the livestock according to their kinds, and all the creatures that move along the ground according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good.
²⁶ Then God said, “Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky, over the livestock and all the wild animals,^{a]" style="font-size: 0.75em; line-height: 0.5em; ">[a]} and over all the creatures that move along the ground.”

²⁷ So God created mankind in his own image,
in the image of God he created them;
male and female he created them.

²⁸ God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.”
²⁹ Then God said, “I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it. They will be yours for food. ³⁰ And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds in the sky and all the creatures that move along the ground—everything that has the breath of life in it—I give every green plant for food.” And it was so.
³¹ God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. And there was evening, and there was morning—the sixth day.

It is good to meditate on the power of God. I find the creation of the earth a good passage to do that with. Here we can find purpose. Here we find His glory. Here we find His goodness.

Psalm 23 (English Standard Version)
A Psalm of David.
1The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.
2He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters.
3He restores my soul.
He leads me in paths of righteousness
for his name’s sake.

4Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

5You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies;
you anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
6Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
all the days of my life,
and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.

This is the second most popular passage in a Bible Gateway article I read last week. This was one of the first Psalms I learned as a child. My favorite Sunday school teacher had us memorize this Psalm and then as a reward he would give us a book of his stories.

This was a psalm of David. David was very familiar with the role of a Shepard. He had grown up as a Shepard. He new what it meant to call God a Shepard and to compare himself to a sheep.
Even though we are silly, stubborn, and can't see past our own desires. Our God still provides for us. He gives us good things despite the fact we don't deserve them.
David also knew what it was like to be near death. His own father-in-law had tried to kill him multiple times. He had fought in many battles. David was no stranger to death. So he could say with confidence that he could,"Fear no evil."
I find this Psalm comforting because, "He leads me in paths of righteousness." I cannot be holy on my own. I cannot live a righteous, let alone a good life. So I trust that God will lead me.
God's "rod and staff" do bring me comfort. I want to know that God will correct my sins, my mistakes. I will fear no evil, because He will save me from doing the wrong I fear so much. He will also save me from the wrongs that others do.
We have a great and powerful God who protects and loves us. He gives us many great gifts that we take for grant.

Dear Heavenly Father, may you lead me in a path of righteousness. May my life show that you have control of your sheep. May I follow you step by step today. May I have to fear no evil, because you are with me. May Your goodness and mercy be shown in every part of my life. Amen.

1 Corinthians 13 (English Standard Version)

The Way of Love
1If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

8Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. 11When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. 12For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.

13So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

We often think about this passage being in conjunction with weddings and couples, but Paul was addressing a different group of people when wrote this passage. Paul was addressing the entire church of Corinth, who were being unloving towards one another. If you look at the passage right before this one is talking about how there is a lack of cooperation in the church. The eye is saying to the hand, "I don't need you."

Love is an action. Love is self-sacrificial. Love over comes our sin nature. Later in this passage it discusses how when we where children we did what children do. Our words, our thoughts, our behavior all were child like. When we become men/women we are suppose to put these things behind us. As men and women of God, we are suppose to exemplify love. We are not to be caught up in our own childish ways. I all to often find my self angry in a situation. I would like to think that I would rise above it and still be able to show God's love to the world, yet I find myself more concerned with my childish desires. I wish to be a woman of God; however, the grace and love I wish to bestow on others alludes my grasp. My mind has sought out worldly solutions to my problems.


Dear Lord, may You give me the love I need to be able to show Your love to the world. Father, I need Your guidance as I go through out my day. That my actions could be traced back to You. One of our greatest testimonies is our actions. My actions are childish, seeking my own desires and gratification. Purify my life of everything that is not You, Father God. Give me love. Give me faith. Give me hope. Amen.

Bible Gateway recently came out with an article with the most popular passages from different cities. Some of the these passages surprised me. Psalm 91 and John 17 both made the list. Other passages did not. Psalm 23 was is every city, but Singapore. 1 Corinthians 13 was in every cities list. I have decided to go over each passage for the next week or so. I have fallen out of doing a regular devotion. I am praying God gives me wisdom as I go over these passages and renews my mind as His.

ది ప్రోదిగల్

I will obey

Here I am
Stripped of my earthly pride
Because with it I would have died

Here I am
Tired my own strategies
Now I'm ready to believe

No matter the cost
No matter the loss
No thought to my life and doing it my way
No matter the chance I have to take
Here's my all
I will obey

Here I am
Confident in your right
Cause you have already won my life

Here I am
Quiet my anxiety and fear
Cause you are already here  

Humbleness

2 Chronicles 7:14
if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land.

I recently started taking karate with my sisters. After this latest class, the Sensi was talking to my sisters and I. He told us this:

"I have taken pictures of students when they first start learning the kata. I then will show them later those pictures. Those with out this, those without humbleness don't see a difference in the stances or how they have improved."

Am I humble? Can I see a difference in my walk with Christ? Have I grown in humility towards God? This reminds me of my father. Sometimes at night I will walk past my parents room and I will see my father on his knees praying. It is not often I see people on their knees before the Lord. Am I humbling myself before my God?

James 4:౧౦
Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.

Joshua 1:1-9
1 After the death of Moses the servant of the LORD, the LORD said to Joshua son of Nun, Moses' aide: 2 "Moses my servant is dead. Now then, you and all these people, get ready to cross the Jordan River into the land I am about to give to them—to the Israelites. 3 I will give you every place where you set your foot, as I promised Moses. 4 Your territory will extend from the desert to Lebanon, and from the great river, the Euphrates—all the Hittite country—to the Great Sea [a] on the west. 5 No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.

6 "Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their forefathers to give them. 7 Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. 8 Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. 9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."


Joshua 11:15
15 As the LORD commanded his servant Moses, so Moses commanded Joshua, and Joshua did it; he left nothing undone of all that the LORD commanded Moses.

Joshua is the man remembered as the one who did as the Lord commanded. The Lord commanded Joshua to go up against Kings of powerful nations. Joshua did it. Joshua was even commanded to put to death one of his own people for taking plunder from one of the forbidden cities. Joshua did it.

Joshua was an aide to Moses. He had the opportunity to be mentored by Moses for over since he was a youth. Joshua was also a warrior. He led the Israelite into battle many times; however, his most famous time is when he followed the Lords instructions in the battle of Jericho.

I wish that God would grant we the faith and courage that He granted Joshua. I pray that I follow closely all the commands of God. May I to have the courage and strength as God uses me.

Psalm 119:74
74 May those who fear you rejoice when they see me,
for I have put my hope in your word.

Deuteronomy 4:7
7 What other nation is so great as to have their gods near them the way the LORD our God is near us whenever we pray to him?

Recently I have been having a hard time in a number of my relationships. As I am a relational person, this is very hard on me. I read this verse and it spoke to me. What other faith has a god that is so near us? What other god has blessed me time and time again in my life? What god not only excepts me, but covers my many and continually brings me back into reconciliation with God? Who continually re-inspires me? There has been no other god, besides the Living God who has provided miracle after miracle in my life.

Deuteronomy 6:20-25
20 In the future, when your son asks you, "What is the meaning of the stipulations, decrees and laws the LORD our God has commanded you?" 21 tell him: "We were slaves of Pharaoh in Egypt, but the LORD brought us out of Egypt with a mighty hand. 22 Before our eyes the LORD sent miraculous signs and wonders—great and terrible—upon Egypt and Pharaoh and his whole household. 23 But he brought us out from there to bring us in and give us the land that he promised on oath to our forefathers. 24 The LORD commanded us to obey all these decrees and to fear the LORD our God, so that we might always prosper and be kept alive, as is the case today. 25 And if we are careful to obey all this law before the LORD our God, as he has commanded us, that will be our righteousness."

Psalm 103:17
¹⁷ But from everlasting to everlasting
the LORD's love is with those who fear him,
and his righteousness with their children's children-


My older sister is about to have a baby. She and her husband had a hard time getting pregnant and there was a lot of sorrow involved for her. One day she and I were talking on the phone. I had mentioned that I was the waiting stage in my life meaning waiting for a boyfriend/husband. She said how she was also waiting for someone. We prayed that day together for who we each were waiting. After we said goodbye and I hung up the phone, God started to put this blessing in my heart. I wrote it down. When my sister announced she was pregnant, God had already given me something to give to her. I pray that this child grows up with the fear of the Lord in his heart and the ability to show the nations of love of God.

Numbers 18

²⁰ The LORD said to Aaron, "You will have no inheritance in their land, nor will you have any share among them; I am your share and your inheritance among the Israelites."

God in this passage is telling Aaron about the duties of the Priests and the offering that the Priest receives. More specifically God is telling Aaron how God wants to be steward with the offering that the Israelites bring to God. The best of the land is given as an offering to God. The best wheat, the best wine from the winepress, the perfect lambs, and all the first fruits of the land are given to Aaron and his family as they serve as priests. Yet God wanted Aaron and his family to remember Him in all the ways He supplied their needs. He asked that they eat certain foods as holy and set apart. What an awesome reminder in their day to day lives of how the Lord provides. Oh, that I too would dwell on all the ways my Savior provides and gives an offering for me. May God and Jesus Christ be my inheritance.

Numbers 15:22-31

²² " 'Now if you unintentionally fail to keep any of these commands the LORD gave Moses- ²³ any of the LORD's commands to you through him, from the day the LORD gave them and continuing through the generations to come- ²⁴ and if this is done unintentionally without the community being aware of it, then the whole community is to offer a young bull for a burnt offering as an aroma pleasing to the LORD, along with its prescribed grain offering and drink offering, and a male goat for a sin offering. ²⁵ The priest is to make atonement for the whole Israelite community, and they will be forgiven, for it was not intentional and they have brought to the LORD for their wrong an offering made by fire and a sin offering. ²⁶ The whole Israelite community and the aliens living among them will be forgiven, because all the people were involved in the unintentional wrong.

²⁷ " 'But if just one person sins unintentionally, he must bring a year-old female goat for a sin offering. ²⁸ The priest is to make atonement before the LORD for the one who erred by sinning unintentionally, and when atonement has been made for him, he will be forgiven. ²⁹ One and the same law applies to everyone who sins unintentionally, whether he is a native-born Israelite or an alien.

³⁰ " 'But anyone who sins defiantly, whether native-born or alien, blasphemes the LORD, and that person must be cut off from his people. ³¹ Because he has despised the LORD's word and broken his commands, that person must surely be cut off; his guilt remains on him.' "

In this passage it talks about three types of sin. Unintentional sin that is done by the community. Unintentional sin that is done by and individual. Intentional sin. In this passage God forgives unintentional sin if the right steps are taken once the individuals involved realize their errors. I have found myself in the middle of a situation and suddenly realized that I was saying or doing something wrong; however, I almost on a daily basis find myself faced with a situation and I knowingly do or say the wrong thing. I am reminded of Samuel's words to Saul.

1 Samuel 15:22
But Samuel replied: "Does the LORD delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the voice of the LORD ? To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams.

Do I have the heart of Saul? Am I saying in my heart, "I can just make it up to God later." God, can you place in me the heart of David, who was ready to obey you and worship you at any moment? Give me a whole heart that seeks after you.

Psalm 119:74

⁷⁴ May those who fear you rejoice when they see me,
for I have put my hope in your word

This is me. I am so distracted by media... and sleep. Sleep has become a very distracting area of my life as well, but that's another story. I recently heard a Preacher on the radio say something to the effect of this. Like personal trainer uses exercise to help build muscle, strength, and endurance in a client, so does God. God has chosen to use specific things to grow and strengthen us. If we abandon prayer, scripture, and fellowship; how can we grow strong? God has chosen to use these simple things to bring us nigh to Him.

Change me Father, into a woman who follows you with out distraction. Give me strength and motivation to seek after you.

If you touch my life
What will it be like
If you live in mine
What will it be like
If you enter my life
Will it be you and I
Always you and I

If you hold my hand
Will it comfort me
If you hold me close
Will you understand me
If I let you close
Will you never leave
Always be with me

How do I decide
If you and I are right
Will I be safe
To let you inside
To let you enjoy the beauty
And learn to live with the ugly...in me

If I touch your life
Will I understand you
If I live in your life
Will I hurt you
If I enter your life
Will I love you
Always love you

John 15:1-17
1"I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. 2He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes[a] so that it will be even more fruitful. 3You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. 4Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.
5"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. 6If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. 7If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. 8This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.
9"As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. 10If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. 11I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. 12My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. 14You are my friends if you do what I command. 15I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. 16You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit—fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. 17This is my command: Love each other.

Last time I posted I talked about the role of the players in the story: The Father, Jesus Christ, and ourselves. In the first sentence of the next paragraph we have a wonderful promise. This promise is that we will bear much fruit. I like being useful. If I feel useless and unneeded, I feel unloved and unloving. Doing things for and with people is how I show affection. Here I have a calling to bear fruit, to be useful. I am called to remain in Christ and to have His word remain in me. So that I can glorify my Father. How much more useful could I be. My purpose in life is to Glorify GOD!

John 15:1-17
1"I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. 2He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes[a] so that it will be even more fruitful. 3You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. 4Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.
5"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. 6If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. 7If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. 8This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.

9"As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. 10If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. 11I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. 12My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. 14You are my friends if you do what I command. 15I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. 16You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit—fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. 17This is my command: Love each other.

Here we have a wonderful passage broken into three paragraphs. The first paragraph discusses our dependency on Christ. He is the only thing that can save us from being cut off and being unable to bear fruit. Without Him we cannot bear fruit. That said there is also a downside to remaining in the vine. We must be pruned. We must have removed anything that is undesired and superfluous. That is the Father's job as the Gardener. This passage defines the role of Christ and the Father. It also defines our role. We are to remain in Christ.

This is my Great Grandmother Beulah... and she is Awesome! ;-)

---

Sweetly, Lord, have we heard Thee calling,
Come, follow Me!
And we see where Thy footprints falling
Lead us to Thee.

Refrain
Footprints of Jesus,
That make the pathway glow;
We will follow the steps of Jesus
Where'er they go.

Though they lead o'er the cold, dark mountains,
Seeking His sheep;
Or along by Siloam's fountains,
Helping the weak.

Refrain
Footprints of Jesus,
That make the pathway glow;
We will follow the steps of Jesus
Where'er they go.

If they lead through the temple holy,
Preaching the Word;
Or in homes of the poor and lowly,
Serving the Lord.

Refrain
Footprints of Jesus,
That make the pathway glow;
We will follow the steps of Jesus
Where'er they go.

Though, dear Lord, in Thy pathway keeping,
We follow Thee;
Through the gloom of that place of weeping,
Gethsemane!

Refrain
Footprints of Jesus,
That make the pathway glow;
We will follow the steps of Jesus
Where'er they go.

Every year or so I find a verse that really captures me. It speaks to me were I am at in my life. Past verses have been Galatians 5:6, Matthew 20:28, Deuteronomy 30:6, and Corinthians 13. The latest verse God has used in my life is:

John 15:5

⁵"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.

"Apart from me you can do nothing." I am leaning that I must be in Christ every waking moment. Yet I find this hard. I long to bear good fruit, great fruit in Christ. Yet my heart is continually wondering. This verse lends me comfort as I strive to remain in Him. I will bear much fruit if I have faith and remain in Christ. Hallelujah!

To often my focus is on the fruit and not on Christ Himself. I focus on being good, sweet, and nice. When I pursue those things my sin nature appears and I fail. I act in a mean, nasty, and vicious way towards others.

Father, may You live in me from day to day, moment by moment. May You be at that center, may You be the reason of all I say and do. I have complete and unwavering faith in You. And may You produce much fruit in me because of my reliance on You. Amen.

Do you ever feel abandoned by God? Do you wonder if He is there? It might have been brought on by a devastating blow. How could God allow this to happen? Maybe it just happened in the monotony of life. Shouldn't a life with Christ be exciting? Joyful? But we have our won way of answering this dryness, this emptiness. We throw ourselves into doing what should bring us closer to God. What can I do to make God happy with me? Devotion times are lengthened. Prayers are moved to closets. If there is a need at church I am there to fill the missing space. And yet I am still void and I am exhausted. Or... I give up and rebel. It's so much easier. Let my sinful nature take over for a while. Just go on cruise control and enjoy myself for a while. That fills me. Fills me with filth and guilt. Fills me, but does not complete me. Now I am not just empty and yearning for something. Now I am broken and hurting. Two rather bleak options. Aren't you glad that God created a third option? It warms my soul knowing He provided a way.

Galatians 5:6

⁶For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision has any value. The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love.

Wow!...How amazing!...Wow?...What does that look like? Faith expressing itself through love?

Luke 7:36-50

³⁶Now one of the Pharisees invited Jesus to have dinner with him, so he went to the Pharisee's house and reclined at the table. ³⁷When a woman who had lived a sinful life in that town learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee's house, she brought an alabaster jar of perfume, ³⁸and as she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them.

³⁹When the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, "If this man were a prophet, he would know who is touching him and what kind of woman she is—that she is a sinner."

⁴⁰Jesus answered him, "Simon, I have something to tell you."
"Tell me, teacher," he said.

⁴¹"Two men owed money to a certain moneylender. One owed him five hundred denarii,^a]">[a] and the other fifty. ⁴²Neither of them had the money to pay him back, so he canceled the debts of both. Now which of them will love him more?"

⁴³Simon replied, "I suppose the one who had the bigger debt canceled."
"You have judged correctly," Jesus said.

⁴⁴Then he turned toward the woman and said to Simon, "Do you see this woman? I came into your house. You did not give me any water for my feet, but she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. ⁴⁵You did not give me a kiss, but this woman, from the time I entered, has not stopped kissing my feet. ⁴⁶You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet. ⁴⁷Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little."

⁴⁸Then Jesus said to her, "Your sins are forgiven."

⁴⁹The other guests began to say among themselves, "Who is this who even forgives sins?"

⁵⁰Jesus said to the woman, "Your faith has saved you; go in peace."

Here we have two very different people with the same problem. There is a Pharisee and a prostitute. One of them hedges themselves with rules and regulations. Man made rules that only push them farther from God. Unable to understand what it means to have faith...and therefore love. Then the other who would not put trust in God. Once again a lack of faith and so there is a miss guided and corrupt love. Yet the one of them has something the other does not. A repented heart and... faith. The result... "Your faith has saved you; go in peace."

I try and live day to day
I try to live a life of change
But I can't seem to be
A holy child by Your design
A perfect life's so far from mine
Will I ever be free

You are one God
You give us one hope
Called us to be Your own
You are one Lord
You give us one faith
Apportioned to me Your grace

I struggle to show humbleness
I don't portray gentlness
I don't feel this bond of peace
Unable to bear patiently
Can't show the love given me
Yet you call me to be part of this unity

You are one God
You give us one hope
Called us to be Your own
You are one Lord
You give us one faith
Apportioned to me Your grace

You've called
To live worthy
Worthy of what I've received
So work over me
In and through me
The power of You in me

You are one God
You give us one hope
Called us to be Your own
You are one Lord
You give us one faith
Apportioned to me Your grace

So..... I haven't posted in a long time.

Deuteronomy 30:6

⁶ The LORD your God will circumcise your hearts and the hearts of your descendants, so that you may love him with all your heart and with all your soul, and live.

This is a passage that I have been meditating and thinking a lot about. When I was younger I was always waiting and yearning for this magical time in my life where I would change. I thought eventually in my life I would reach this spiritual peak or as a friend put it a "spiritual plateau." A place where I am finally good enough or holy enough to not struggle with a wondering heart. That I would finally get down the basics of being a "good" christian. I don't think I will ever be there. We will constantly struggle with sin in our lives. I don't think I will ever be able to love God perfectly. Yet that is the beauty of it. I unable to even love God, yet He loves me. He loves me so perfectly, tenderly, and overwhelmingly. I am in awe of my Savior and His loving grace for me.

So much has happened...I don't even know were to begin. Maybe at the beginning.

I've been attending a Latino Church in Annapolis. I started going there to practice my Spanish and helping my friend do Children's Church. This church has given so much to me in the way of hospitality and Christian fellowship.
My friend has a love and passion for ministering to these people that is amazing to watch. She would love to someday start a Orphanage in El Salvador. She and I have joked/dreamed of going together to start this orphanage. She would run the orphanage. I would be the nurse and cook meals for the hundreds of children that we care for.
A few weeks ago a man from a sister church of the Latino church in Annapolis came. He told my friend he had land in El Salvador and would like to give her land to build her orphanage. God is so amazing how He works His will.
Now we both need your prayers.
~Pray for my friend as she explores this. May God show her His path.
~Pray for her as she will need money and support to go.
~Pray that she has the support of her church.
~Pray that her ministry would be effective in El Salvador.
~Pray for me as I'm finishing school. May I finish strong so I can be a good nurse.
~Pray for me as I am searching out God's will. I would love to be a nurse in El Salvador, but God might have something bigger in mind for me. May He direct my path and make it clear.
~Pray for both of us as we make desicions. May we grow in our faith and lean all the more on our Savior.

Here I am with my once a month post....I really should try and post more.

Anyway, tomorrow my friend and I are going to sing a song for offertory. We're going to sing "Mighty to Save" by Laura Story. My mom received her CD for her birthday. Since it's now on the ipod she let me take it to my car to listen to. The lyrics have been really blessing me. I think my favorites are "Immortal, Invisible", "Grace", "Bless the Lord", and of course "Mighty to Save".